glass bones and paper skin
by ncfan
Summary: They do naught but tear at each other.


I was just noticing that Rosa and Beatrice have the same color scheme with their clothes, at least with what Rosa wears to the family conference. Somehow, I doubt this is a coincidence. Anyway, there aren't enough fics here that focus on Rosa, which I think is just awful. Yeah, she's crazy, but that ought to make her character more interesting to explore. I'm not attempting to justify Rosa's actions, just explore them.

On a second note, I'm playing out a couple of WMG's from the _Umineko_ trope page, which I enjoy doing (If you haven't already guessed). If any of it runs contrary to canon, I apologize.

I own nothing.

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><p>The scene we are introduced with is a familiar one to anyone who happens to be hanging about the docks this time of year. In a rustle of long skirts and shoe soles clacking against wood, a woman and her child make their way towards the boat to Rokkenjima.<p>

They're both quite pretty in their own ways. The mother is willowy and has long light brown hair that verges on golden in the sunlight. The girl has darker hair, rich in shade, with a face straight out of a Hallmark card and eyes as blue as the ocean depths. It is a distinctly human fault to mistake beauty for perfection and contentment, and some do, perhaps, when they see these two walking.

For those who observe more closely, troubles soon emerge. The mother's pace is more brisk than what's natural, a hurried look on her face, brow furrowed beneath the curtain of her bangs. She has her hand clamped tightly around that of her daughter's, and when the little girl complains of the pressure she twists her head around to snap at her. _"If you hadn't insisted on getting that candy we wouldn't be late! Now keep up!"_

Shocked by the sheer level of animosity in her mother's voice, the little girl starts to cry, her hiccupy sobs utterly pitiful. A spasm passes over the woman's face, and she stops long enough to lean down, dry her daughter's tears, apologize in a low voice and promise her ice cream "when this is all over." They continue on at a slower pace, all forgiven.

Observers may be disturbed by the display that they see, but do nothing to intervene. They tell themselves that if there is a problem, it is between the mother and her daughter, and it is their responsibility to fix. They can not know what goes on behind closed doors or in places where censure can not be had.

Like a cancer growing on the heart, this is the love that grows more diseased with each retelling. This is the relationship that loves too little, too much, and can not see truth for the two broken minds it involves. This is Ushiromiya Rosa and her daughter Maria, tearing each other apart in their own ways.

-0-0-0-

Rosa loves her little girl, Maria. She beams on her and pets and kisses her and spoils her so much that onlookers find displays of affection between them to be unrealistic and disgustingly saccharine. No one can deny, however, that she loves her daughter; Rosa isn't the sort of woman to indulge in such a display if her feelings are false.

What Rosa regrets most is that her work consumes her life so completely that next to no time is left for Maria. It can't be helped—Rosa is deep in debt after her ex-fiancé refused to take responsibility for the loan he had her cosign—but Rosa is still tormented by guilt.

_I'll take the day off tomorrow and surprise her,_ Rosa promises herself on so many quiet, lonely midnights, when she finds herself trapped in her office, looking over bills and orders and invoices with increasing anxiety. _We can go out in to town and go shopping and have nice meals—Maria never asks to eat out; I think she'd like eating at a big restaurant._

She always tells herself that, but Rosa is never able to get away from work. There's simply too much to be done, and too many worries. But she still regrets it in a stomach-twisting sort of way. Rosa has the most adorable daughter in the world—why shouldn't she want to spend time with her?

-0-0-0-

Maria loves her Mama very much, even more than she loves the Golden Witch. She has the most beautiful Mama in the whole world, a tall, graceful woman with long, soft golden grown hair that Maria loves nothing more than to hold in her hands and brush. Mama has a voice like an autumn sunset—sweet and soothing, always fit to lull Maria into a state of blissful security.

At the same time that Maria loves Rosa best of anyone, she can't help but be a little sad. Rosa has to work day and night to make the money needed to keep her company afloat. That money also goes to keep their lavish home and so Maria can wear her elegant, well-made western clothes. Rosa doesn't always come home every night, and when she does she's so tired that all she can do is plant a weary kiss on Maria's head before collapsing into a deep sleep on her bed or, in times of extremity, even on the sofa.

Sadness seeps into Maria's heart like a chest cold when she counts away the lengthening hours, sees the shadows grow, and Rosa still isn't home. She doesn't hate or resent her though; those ugly emotions don't even enter into her thoughts. Maria knows her Mama doesn't want to be cooped up in her office all day and night, and instead of resenting Rosa for being away so often, Maria values what time she and her mother have together.

Maria loves spending time with her mother, be it shopping, the rare meal eaten together, playing games, or just sitting on the sofa and watching T.V., Rosa stroking Maria's hair absently, half-asleep with her head pillowed against the left arm of the sofa. Rosa is always tired, always just a little absentminded, just a little distracted whenever they do things together, but Maria doesn't care. Whatever it is, she doesn't mind.

So long as Mama's here, Maria is happy.

-0-0-0-

Rosa hates her little girl, Maria.

Just as much as Rosa hates Maria, she hates herself for feeling this way, because she's not supposed to feel this way and if she was a _good_ mother her only feelings towards Maria would be that of love. She's not supposed to hate the girl she loves so much, but she does, and she just can't stop.

The girl has been nothing but a blight on Rosa's life from the moment she learned she was pregnant. Her fiancé had not been understanding of the unplanned pregnancy, storming out the moment Rosa, with great trepidation, had told him of her pregnancy. She can still remember the way he raged _"I knew it! You _have _been with another man, haven't you?" _and no matter how Rosa pleaded with him that _"No, of course I haven't; you know I never would_," he wouldn't listen to her. After that day, she never saw him again, but her fiancé's debts are still with her.

The world does not look kindly on single mothers. Wherever Rosa goes, if she has Maria in tow she hears the whispers, sees the sideways looks, no matter whether they're really there or not. She hears the whispers of _"loose", "easy", "slut",_ and_ "whore"_, feels the barrage constantly drive wicked nails into her skin. She sees the looks of commingled pity and disgust and stiffens, her lip curling. Maria's every request draws her ire, Rosa's hand itching until there comes one pitiful whine and one "Uu-uu" too many, and that hand comes down across her daughter's face like a sledgehammer.

Rosa doesn't know why her daughter has to adopt such a pathetically childish tic anyways, nor why Maria has to tout such a fixation on the occult. _"This is the reason you don't have any friends! This is the reason you're picked on at school!" _she screams at Maria at her worst moments. The "Uu-uu's", so constant, grind on Rosa's skull until she just can't listen to it anymore, and she wonders how she was ever cursed with a child in the first place.

All she can see is the child who deprived her of her husband. All she can see is the reason no man will take her now, because they don't want to deal _"with another man's bastard." _All Rosa can see is the chain around her ankle.

_Why was I ever cursed with this child?_

-0-0-0-

Maria hates her Mama very much, more than she has hated or ever will hate anyone else, even the bullies at her school. Her motives are perhaps less complex, but at the same time, less complicated reasons for hate means that her hate is all the more potent.

Despite what anyone might think, Maria doesn't hate Rosa when she hits her or when she tears up her toys. That's not her Mama, she tells herself over and over again; that's the Black Witch taking over, cruelly stealing her Mama's face to bring her darkness into the world. Maria will find a way to purge Mama of the Black Witch with her magic, and she couldn't possibly hate Rosa for what the Black Witch makes her do. And even if it is Rosa hitting her, which Maria has to admit that it sometimes is, there's always a reason.

Instead, Maria hates her mother for squandering the time she could be spending with her.

Rosa claims that when she doesn't come home at night, that when she spends the weekends away, it's all due to work. That she absolutely has to finish these reports, that she has to take these business trips or else _Anti-Rosa_ will go under. Maria can hear her mother's voice over the phone and the regret in her tones dribbles all the way through the phone lines to moisten Maria's cheeks.

Lies, all of it.

Perhaps some of those times are because Rosa really has to work, but Maria knows the truth for most of it. Mama's trying to get another man, and neglects her daughter to do it. Mama's going on dates with other men, and breaks promises made with Maria to do it.

_Why? Why aren't I good enough for her? Shouldn't I be all she needs? _Maria doesn't know why Rosa isn't content to just stay home with her, to just be in the house at the same time she is. Maria doesn't ask for much—she just wants to have someone to tuck her in to bed, to be down in the kitchen eating a meal with her, to be there.

It shouldn't be so much to ask for, but apparently it's too much for Rosa.

Maria can't do anything but hate her for it.

-0-0-0-

Rosa is born into a world that has neither room nor place for her. She is by far the youngest of the four Ushiromiya children, twelve years younger than Rudolf, fifteen from Eva, seventeen from Krauss. Her birth, she suspects, was a pure accident, given how much younger she is than her siblings and given that her mother was middle-aged by the time she had her. At any rate, there is no place for Rosa in the already well-constructed world of Rokkenjima.

There is no company to be found for a child with sunny golden hair. Rosa is left to her own devices, lonely and solitary. However, that is how she prefers it, for soon Rosa discovers that this world of glitter and gold is so ugly, and that the inadequate will be crushed.

As a child, Rosa sees all of her siblings as larger than life figures. They are all so much older and seem so glamorous, so accomplished, so much like adults. Rosa sees them all with starry eyes, but those eyes, initially awash in adoration, are drawn specifically to Eva. Eva is so grown up, so beautiful, so intelligent. She gets all the best grades in school, better even than Krauss, is the perfect heiress, and Rosa wishes so much that she could be just like her big sister. Knowing that imitation is likely impossible, Rosa wants to be Eva's friend instead. They're sisters; surely they can form some manner of bond based on that.

Bonds and friendships between siblings are nothing more than a ridiculous fantasy among the Ushiromiya, as Rosa soon learns. This is a family of wolves who tear each other apart without mercy. In a family that savages its own, an innocent is only the first victim.

Rosa's older siblings hold her as a target of resentment and irritation. Her birth signaled a further division of the family inheritance upon their father's death. No one wants to share the money, least of all with a child sibling who is inferior to them in every way. If not for fear of how the law would react, Rosa suspects that her family would have killed each other by now.

Krauss and Rudolf have verbal contempt for their youngest sister, but for the most part can not be bothered with her, having enough on their plate to start with. Eva, on the other hand, has no outlet for her frustrations than to take them out on her baby sister.

Everyone even remotely associated with the Ushiromiya clan knows that Eva is in all respects a far superior heir than her elder brother. No one can deny that, and to no one is it more apparent than to Eva herself. What everyone associated with the Ushiromiya also knows is that Eva is barred from ever succeeding as the head due to her sex, and that Krauss lords that knowledge over her at every opportunity.

Eva's hatred of her brother can not be expressed, so she turns to her sister to vent her rage. Rather than being the sister who guides and protects her younger sibling, Eva is towards Rosa a merciless bully who taunts, needles, and insults. Rosa soon learns to run or to at least make herself as inconspicuous as possible when Eva is in the vicinity. The only way for Eva to alleviate her own pain is to inflict more pain on Rosa. The same goes for all of her siblings; if Krauss, Rudolf or Eva are in the same room, and especially if they're all there, Rosa does everything she can to become invisible, so they never notice her flinching at their raised voices and realize that there's a timid little sheep here terrified of the wolves. There are no friends to be had here.

Their father is a devil to all of them when caught in the throes of his absinthe or a particularly black mood, which is often, leaving his children covered in welts and bruises. Their mother berates Rosa for her inability to get good grades and for her lack of talent. And throughout all of this, everyone expects Rosa to behave as the perfect young lady, for she is a child and a girl child at that.

Rosa knows she is not the equal of her siblings. She is neither strong nor smart, and her voice is lost among the din of screaming that is the Ushiromiya. There is so much rage bottled inside, so much pain. Her moods alternate from elated to dejected in a split second. (_If Rosa would just see a doctor, there is help that could be had for her, but it never occurs to her that there is something wrong that can be fixed with medicine._)

Trapped on Rokkenjima, her gilded prison, Rosa dreams of sprouting wings and flying away. She could be an albatross, a seagull, and just soar over the endless blue ocean, and never come back. She would find a place, a warm, sunny island in the South Pacific as unlike gloomy, hate-filled Rokkenjima as anything can be.

Even after leaving Rokkenjima, she feels trapped. Even with Rosa's mother gone and her siblings no longer quite so cruel as they once were, Rosa is trapped in a prison of paper skin and glass bones. The world is a narrow place of rough hands tearing her apart, dragging her back down into the mire every time she tries to lift her eyes to the sun.

She just needs to vent her pain.

-0-0-0-

Maria doesn't understand why her mother has to hit her every time she gets mad or every time Maria does something wrong. Her cheeks sting for hours on end (but somehow, there are never any bruises left behind) and Maria wonders what on Earth it was she did to make her Mama so mad.

Every night when she lies down to sleep, Maria dreams of a world where Rosa is always happy. Mama doesn't have any stress, life is perfect, and there are only smiles. No blows, only laughter and kisses. There would never be any sadness or tears in the world Maria so wishes to construct.

This is not that world, however, and all of Maria's desperate witchcraft can not make it so. She prays, she pleads, she writes secret charms and performs secret spells. She does her very best to be the sort of daughter she thinks Rosa wants. To that end, Maria becomes all but self-sufficient, getting herself up in the morning, making her own lunches, learning how to cook simple meals and how to pay the cashiers at the local stores. _Mama will be proud of me, _Maria assures herself, as she wears a huge grin to show her Mama how grown up she is.

It's not enough; it never is. Rosa ignores her, belittles and berates her, and what's worse are the moments when the blackness appears and those delicate, porcelain hands become weapons, clawed and cruel.

So it can't be Mama. It can't possibly be Mama who is shrouded by blackness, Maria eventually convinces herself. The Black Witch has come and possesses Rosa in her moments of fury, and when Maria looks at her, she sees a completely different person.

-0-0-0-

No one ever dares to comment on it, not even when she's not there to hear, but Rosa bears more than a passing resemblance to the Golden Witch.

It's not noticeable at first, primarily because no one's really looking for points of similarity in appearance between Rosa and Beatrice to begin with. At any rate, that gorgeous portrait of Beatrice hanging in the Ushiromiya mansion doesn't immediately show similarities to Rosa either. Beatrice's hair is golden-blonde and her eyes blue, while Rosa's eyes are brown and her hair, showing golden hints only in sunlight, hasn't been blonde, really blonde, since childhood.

However, on closer inspection, a resemblance does start to be noticed, by everyone.

Rosa and the Golden Witch have a vaguely similar facial structure; both are tall, statuesque women. Beatrice's elaborate gown has the same color scheme as what Rosa wears to the family conference every year, and if she pinned her hair up and wore a rose behind her right ear, the resemblance would become striking. From a distance, the two could be mistaken for sisters.

Everyone notices, and never says. They dare not draw the likeness to the light of day.

(Unfortunately for Rosa, Kinzo notices too.)

-0-0-0-

And perhaps also unfortunately, Maria also notices the resemblance between her Mama and the Golden Witch.

As Maria learns to differentiate between Rosa and the Black Witch, certain other lines start to blur. _Mama sort of looks like Beatrice, doesn't she? There has to be a reason for that, right?_

Maria starts to imagine that light brown hair runs golden, that honey brown eyes hold a flash of blue, and when she sleeps, "Mama" looks less like Rosa and more like someone else. These things she never notices, and she runs down the garden path with her Mama, never noticing that "Mama" wears a ball gown and a flower in her hair.

-0-0-0-

When making a certain doll, Rosa puts loving care and attention into every stitch, choosing only the finest, sturdiest fabrics and the finest stuffing. This, after all, to be a doll for Maria; what sort of mother would she be if she gave her daughter a birthday present that fell apart after the first week?

Rosa will never forget the transformation that overtook Maria's face when she gave her the doll her child christened Sakutaro. Her face had lit up in that cramped restaurant to see button eyes and yellow felt. Rosa hadn't had the heart to tell Maria to keep her voice down, that she was disturbing the other patrons; the joy in Maria's voice warmed Rosa's heavy heart. It almost made up for the fact that the reservations at the other restaurant had fallen through.

All that happiness goes away within months.

Maria's foolishness and disobedience has brought the eye of child welfare on them—_I'm just trying to make a living; I'm just trying to support my daughter; I don't see why I can't take a break every once in a while; do I always have to be stuck here waiting hand and foot on my child?_—and there is ringing in Rosa's ears, a roaring in her brain, a black film over her eyes.

The way that officer talked, you would have thought all Rosa did was leave her daughter at home while she went on dates and vacations with men. True, Rosa does on occasion look for a man to fill the void in her life, but far more of her time is occupied with work. Work to keep this house, work to keep Maria in comfort…

Maria. It's all Maria's fault.

And she needs to be punished.

All Rosa remembers of that night is that she tore up Sakutaro in her hands. She may have destroyed some of Maria's other toys, but all she remembers is Sakutaro. She remembers how easily it was to tear the stuffed lion apart, despite having hands as small and delicate as they are. She remembers renting felt, remembers stuffing falling to the floor, remembers ripping the head from the main body and shoving it in Maria's face.

"_Sakutaro is dead now." _Looking back, Rosa sounds demented even to her own ears, barely human, not herself.

For a week, maybe two, Rosa manages to convince herself that destroying Sakutaro was the right thing to do. She closes her ears to the sound of Maria's near-constant, hysterical sobs, closes her eyes to the sight of salty tears, closes her heart to Maria's agony. _It was the right thing to do, _comes the constant mantra, as Rosa tries to rub away a growing headache. _Maria's too old to be having a doll out in public anyways, and disobedience must be punished._

Eventually her mind clears, and Rosa can't justify her actions anymore, not even to herself. She has destroyed her daughter's most cherished toy, something she made for Maria with her own hands. The situation did not warrant such a blow—Maria is just a child, and in the end, child welfare _did_ go away. She could have just settled for grounding Maria, making her go for a week without dessert or television, _anything_ besides destroying Maria's beloved Sakutaro.

Rosa is wracked with guilt but never tells Maria so. She never says "_I'm sorry_", _"I shouldn't have done that; can you ever forgive me?" _or anything else. Rosa does regret it, but she never says anything to Maria about it. She doubts Maria has forgiven her for destroying the toy, despite the fact that she behaves as though Sakutaro never existed, and how could she forgive her? Her Mama won't even say "sorry"; Rosa can't, just can't bring herself to apologize.

Instead, Rosa plans a surprise for Maria in secret.

She has made a new Sakutaro, and was planning on giving it to Maria at this year's conference on Rokkenjima, the only apology Rosa could possibly manage. Maybe that will make Maria happy again. Maybe, with a new Sakutaro, one that Rosa will never, _ever_ lay a hand on in anger, Maria will find it in her heart to forgive her.

However, when Rosa misplaces the stuffed toy and goes to look for it on the boat, she can't find it. _Now this is ridiculous, _she muses, running a hand through her hair. _I had the toy in my suitcase; it can't have just gotten up and walked away. And if Maria had found it, I'm sure I would have noticed by now. She would have been running up and down the ship, squealing in happiness—sweet child_, she thinks with exasperated fondness—_and it's not like Maria is good at keeping secrets to start with. She would have let slip by now; why would she even bother to hide her joy at having her favorite toy back again?_

No matter. Rosa will ask the captain to look for the stuffed animal, and she'll just give the new Sakutaro to Maria on the way home.

-0-0-0-

Sakutaro is Maria's only friend in a world of absent mothers and cruel, prejudiced classmates. A stuffed animal that, with Beatrice's help becomes a boy with lion ears and a scarf, is her best friend, caring and understanding, drying her tears when she cries.

That's why Maria will never forgive the Black Witch for killing him.

She sees now the urgency in purging Rosa of the Black Witch. That hideous, inhuman creature needs to be exorcised from her Mama's flesh, before she swallows Rosa up entirely.

Without Sakutaro, Maria's spells become dark and angry, punctuated with near-constant promises of violence and rage. She wants the bullies at her school to die, she wants the lives of the teachers to run to dust and agony, she wants anyone who bothers her to suffer tenfold what they inflict upon her.

More than anything, she wants the Black Witch dead and gone, for killing Sakutaro. And at this point, Maria no longer cares if she has to kill her Mama in order to rid herself of the cruel Black Witch. Nothing will bring Sakutaro back, but if she can just have her revenge…

-0-0-0-

Rosa will become a lioness to protect her daughter. Hordes of demons or an evil witch couldn't stand in her way, if Maria was threatened; she might even go so far as to attack with a pen, if that was all she had on her person at the time.

Despite this, she can not forgive her daughter, nor herself. Rosa can not forgive Maria for being the millstone about her throat, and Rosa can not, will not, forgive herself for being such a bad Mama.

If she was a good Mama, she would welcome Maria at every moment, despite being a single mother who has to work constantly just to keep afloat. If Rosa was a good Mama, she would never look twice at a man, and her daughter would be all she needed. If Rosa was a good Mama, her feelings towards Maria would not be so conflicted—they wouldn't swing from love to hate and back again within minutes, violent and terrifying.

Rosa is not a good Mama, and Maria must judge her every second of the day for being such a horrible parent.

So all she can do is protect her.

That's all she's good for, in the end.

-0-0-0-

Rosa may not be able to forgive Maria or herself, but Maria can do both with ease.

The reason Maria can be so forgiving is quite simple, really. Maria is a witch; with magic, she can do anything and everything she wants. And when the Black Witch is gone and Rosa's mind and body are truly her own again, everything will be fine.

Maria's sure of it.


End file.
